Things weren’t meant to turn out this way, were they?

For nearly eleven years I’ve written a great deal about the reality of selling up and moving to Spain, then settling down to living and working here.  For all that time it was a shared experience; mine and Brian’s, my beloved husband. We entertained our family and friends back home in the UK and elsewhere abroad with our ‘Andalucian Adventure’ and certainly had fun living it. Tragically though on Friday 20th May this year and just a few weeks short of our 23rd Wedding Anniversary, I lost Brian to the 'Big C' and my life is now changed forever.

We scrubbed up well, me and him!

I’ll remain hopeful that once the brakes finally grind this emotional rollercoaster to a halt and I can disembark without falling dizzily flat on my face, a new adventure can begin where the old one abruptly ceased.  I realise of course that healing this gaping wound in my heart won’t be a quick process, far from it.  I’m fine with that and can bide my time; in the meantime, I have many wonderful friends who lend an ear and a shoulder to cry on whenever I’m having a wobbly moment. It’s of great comfort to my family back in the UK that I have such a good support network here.  Friendships often count for the most when tragedy strikes.  From day one there was a circling of the wagons to protect me from the flinging bows and arrows of grief and loneliness marauding outside.

I am quite determined to carry on with my life here in beautiful Andalucia.  There is quite simply something magical about this place which seeps into one’s very being.  Luckily for me, part of that magic resides within the boundaries of Finca del Olivar, my home.  There is a beautiful quote by Khalil Gibran which reads: “Does not your house dream? and dreaming, leave the city for grove or hilltop?”  Well, that’s Finca del Olivar: nestled on a hilltop, sandwiched between mountain peak and valley floor, and surrounded by an olive grove. An assortment of fruit trees completes the flavoursome beauty of the place.
 

My little piece of Paradise: Finca del Olivar

Right now, I’m pretty well occupied with sorting out legal matters which come hand in glove with inheriting Brian’s half of our joint assets.  The wheels of officialdom turn slowly in Andalucia but one gets used to the wait, there really is no choice in the matter!  The UK side of things was pretty straightforward, save for a couple of hitches with the bank which nearly sent me cowering to a dark corner!  Actually, when I think of it, I’ve impressed myself with what I’ve managed to achieve so far.  Whilst Brian and I had our responsibilities fairly equally divided, he managed all the ‘big’ stuff like the finances.  Math and me fell out in first grade and never made it up.  Please!, I get in a sweat trying to divide a simple restaurant bill equally among friends after a night out.  Somehow though, in baby steps, I’m getting to grips with handling the grown up stuff that Brian always took care of and I’m doing ok.

So, welcome to my blog.  For the benefit of those who don’t know me, who am I?  Good question, since I’m often not quite sure myself!  My name is Beverley, but Bev is fine.  I’m in my third year of teaching English as a foreign language.  My students range from age 3 years to adults of 18 years plus.  I’m an avid reader and have a huge number of interests which could easily grow now as I lurch forwards into that domain once fiercely guarded by Brian, that of managing my finances and maintaining the house, land and swimming pool.  All of these things have already brought pretty large challenges and it’s been a steep learning curve mostly, but I’m also learning pretty damn quickly that challenges faced and won are hugely empowering.  My brain works at a million miles an hour, and it’s not unusual to see me flipping to the next project without finishing the one (or two) I started before, especially when it comes to knitting projects which bore me easily with their fiddlyness.  I’m more “starter continuer” than “completer finisher”.  I guess that will have to change. 

Finca del Olivar occupies a quiet spot not far from Malaga, on the outskirts of a delightful little town called Alhaurin el Grande.  I have two cats for company and, barely a stone’s throw away, two beautiful pure bred Andalucian horses that I can ride whenever I want. 
 


Alhaurin el Grande, an Artist's impression




From left to right, Fudge (aka Boo) and Humbug (aka The Stripey Assassin)



So, if you can keep up, I’ll share all the trials and tribulations of learning to cope after losing your soul mate and best friend, and what it’s like picking up the pieces and ultimately moving on again with a little more ‘savvy’.  I’ll share the up’s and the down’s, I’ll share my interests, hobbies, and maybe even spark the occasional philosophical debate.  My life as an English teacher will likely feature quite highly due in no small part to the fact that there is never a dull moment in doing it, my students see to that.  In short, I shall leave nothing out (well, I may consider omitting certain bits of detail lest they should incriminate me in some fashion!).  Above all though, I hope my stories will inspire and amuse you in equal measure. 

My next blog will follow shortly.  There’s already a lot to tell you and believe me I can talk.  You’ll figure that out soon enough.

Stay tuned!